The Way to a Woman's Heart

Some people say the way to a woman’s heart is through her brain. Some others say the way to a woman’s heart is through her mouth. Some feel the way to a woman’s heart is through your purse. But I say the way to a woman’s heart is only through the heart and nothing else.

If a woman feels that the way to her heart is through your purse, it is her problem. Don’t make it your problem. Same for a woman who feels that the way to her heart is through her brain. Only a sane woman who knows herself, realizes that the way to her heart is through her heart. In fact such a woman will know that the way to her brain is through her brain and a way to her stomach is through her stomach (not her mouth, mind you, and that goes for men too, for people who think that the way to their stomach is through the mouth (tongue, taste) will overeat and be fat like me!)

I was a fool when I was younger. I thought the way to a woman’s heart was through her brain and repeatedly kept on making the mistake of trying to become an ‘intellectual’. I had to learn the hard way that for a woman to feel loved, you should only love her. And when you love her, you’ll see that it needs no effort to ‘understand’ her. She starts off being understood! And such a woman is not mysterious at all and there is no such thing as: ‘the enigma called woman’!

Today (January 18th 2011) I add that where man mainly fails with a woman is that instead of loving her, he tries to impress her. In my first encounter with a woman, I made the mistake of keeping on trying to impress her instead of making her feel loved. In my heart of hearts I knew she was already impressed. But due to a feeling of inferiority in me due to my slightly disadvantaged economic circumstance, I felt that the only way I could keep her is by keeping her continuously impressed. And this I reckoned I could do by being an intellectual. But even now I am not a hundred percent sure, because I feel I really did a lot to show her she was loved, and inasmuch as I continue to feel that I in fact showed her she was loved, but yet got nothing in return but traumatic experiences, I guess the 'Enigma called woman continues'!

But then what is this love? Frankly I don’t really know how to describe it. At present I think I have it for one person, but life has taught me – ‘Never be too sure!’ If I feel too confident and haughty it may vanish.

I’m saying all this with my experience of two women. But I’m not too sure if I can generalize –“ The world is too complex a place for your simple philosophies…” and Man has repeatedly made a fool of himself.

As an aside, I add that any man who thinks that the way to a woman’s heart is through his purse will soon realize that, in fact, the way to a woman’s purse is through his purse - by the hefty alimony settlements he would have to make.

P.S.  "It takes a very unusual mind to understand the obvious"  (A quote in Bangalore Mirror, 18th Jan, 2011)


Perhaps there is a really principled way to a woman's heart - but to the heart of a principled woman who is lion hearted. Given below is a link to a TED Talk by Kiram Bedi IPS (Retd.) who had the guts to give a Parking Ticket to Indira Gandhi's car. Please click on the link AND GIVE A MINUTE FOR THE PROGRAM TO LOAD AND PLAY.

http://www.ted.com/talks/kiran_bedi_a_police_chief_with_a_difference.html


Deepak Bellur