A MULTI-METER MISADVENTURE
Panache! That is the one thing we ‘Officers’ who work for the Government of India have. At least the majority of us have it. One day it occurred to the minds of a few ‘Directors’ of a government organization that a multi-meter was needed to keep the electrical circuits that linked a few computers and their hardware accessories in order. There was Dr. Malhotra, Dr. Kashinath and Dr. Mani Reddy and a few others of us who decided that one multi-meter should be purchased without further delay. We summoned a jeep from the Transport division, into which we all huddled dressed in our finest suits and ties, and all equipped with our fancy brief-cases. Such occasions provided an opportunity for an outing and a break from the dreary existence of being ensconced between the four walls of a drab, dilapidated office with heavy, creaking teak-wood tables and chairs smudged with blotches of ink. We could explore the romantic outside world where savage ‘market-forces’ prevailed and which we could savour and even come out on top!
So it happened that about eight of us, cramped tightly in a vehicle, drove over to the main office of a large company specializing in the manufacture of electronic goods. As we made our way inside, we confronted the receptionist and the leader of our group introduced himself. “I’m Dr. Malhotra. Director,” and spelt out the name of the organization craftily avoiding saying that he was just one of the several tens of directors that the organization had, and made it sound as if he was the top boss. “..I would like to meet someone from Marketing!”
“Just a minute, Sir!” said the receptionist with alacrity, “I’ll put you across to the Marketing Manager”
Presently, our group was led to the chambers of the Marketing Manager who rose from his seat to welcome the group. There was a second round of introduction. “I’m Dr. Malhotra, Director, this is Dr. Kashinath and this is Dr. Mani Reddy, Senior Scientific Officers and so on”. “We are interested in multimeters!”
“Please take your seats!” said the Marketing Manager, Mr. Kaushik.
“Sir! What would you all like to drink? Coke? Pepsi?..or bottled Mango juice?”, Kaushik proffered generously.
The members of our group discussed among ourselves and it was unanimously decided that we all would have bottled mango juice.
“Ramu! Get eight bottles of chilled Mangold!”, Kaushik ordered.
In the time the drinks were to arrive, Mr. Kaushik ventured to exchange pleasantries and make small talk. He asked each of them which part of India they belonged to. Then he praised the subject of geology and said that he had passing acquaintance with certain interesting aspects of the subject and expressed clearly visible wonderment that the Himalayas and even Mount Everest was once under the sea. Then he talked of the gold resources of our country and was visibly disappointed when he was informed that K.G.F. had outlived its use. He evinced interest in a few other aspects of geology in the time that the drinks arrived.
Presently the group had their refreshing drinks and a pleasant glow came over our faces.
Mr Kaushik, sensing that the opportune moment had arrived, cautiously ventured to broach the subject.
“Well, Dr. Malhotra!” intoned Mr. Kaushik, “You said your organization was interested in multi-meters…how many multi-meters are you interested in buying?”
“One number”, said Malhotra guilelessly, and in a typical government fashion.
“You could buy that in any shop for two hundred rupees!!!”, wailed Kaushik, sorely disappointed as he perhaps was expecting an order for a few thousand sets.
To be fair to our group of adventurers, none of us realized we had committed a commercial gaffe, for in a government organization, purchasing even a packet of staples is a big deal!
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